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Take, for example, this image from a feature in the UK periodical The Sun; they flipped the script by posing ordinary men in underwear ads a la David Beckham or Christiano Ronaldo: women prefer large and burly even when society insists that they only like guys who look like they’re 3% body fat.More importantly though, it’s important to remember that attraction is about more than just looks – it’s about personality, presence and what you bring to the table.The next key is simply to accept that your body is your body and your shape is your shape and there is only so much that you can do to change that.Your overall shape is going to be controlled by your bone structure and genetics as much as is by your diet and exercise.The problem is that all this does is draw attention to the fact that you’re trying to hide things – and making you look you.Even if you’re big, wearing clothes that fit properly will flatter your profile and make you look more attractive.Societal standards of beauty are not only arbitrary but often literally impossible to achieve without Photoshop and make-up and there are assholes out there who feel empowered to mock fat people with impunity.

Others are shorter and squatter and will always appear heavier.

Being fat is treated as a referendum on your worth as a person – people see it as an implication that you’re only fat because you simply don’t want to change badly enough. The societal disdain for heavyset people is so ingrained that even people who are fat feel ashamed about who they are and that they have to apologize for some personal flaw that leaves them with the mark of Canes when the truth about obesity is as much about external factors as it is about food consumption.

After all, if they’d just apply themselves, fat people could lose weight easily! Over the years, we have been discovering that there are innumerable other factors that affect body fat accumulation and weight gain.

Large dudes will frequently lament that their size automatically disqualifies them from dating – they believe that there is simply no way a woman could possibly like somebody who’s body isn’t rippled and shiny like a buttered ear of corn. Kevin Smith, for all of his fashion sins that I will get into in a second, is happily married with a lovely wife and daughter. It’s easy to forget this when the TV and magazines are showing you nothing but image after image of cut, veiny men with swimmers builds with women draped all over them like fur stoles, but women actually like a far wider range of body types than we’d think.

Ask five women what their ideal male build is and you’ll get six different answers.

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